Be careful what you ask for!

We have heard this phrase a million times ... "Be careful what you wish for" but sometimes it is more accurate to say "Be careful what you ASK for".

Last night my groom prayed with me before we went to sleep and in the prayer he said, "Prepare us for us adversity so we may be ready to stand firm and increase our faith ."

As soon as he said that I thought, "We better buckle up and prepare for the wild ride that is about to to come!"

I spent three years in a Bible study with older women who had endured countless trials and suffering and, being young and lacking life experience, I asked, "Should I pray for trials so I am able to grow and have the wisdom that you do?" They unanimously screamed, "NO! You are young and the trials will come. Allow the Lord to strengthen you when He purposes - do not go looking for it."

While I understood what they meant, I am still not convinced they were right.

"Test me, O Lord, and try me, examine my heart and my mind; for Your love is ever before me, and I walk continually in Your truth." Psalm 26: 2,3

"Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there be any hurtful way in me, and lead me in the everlasting way." Psalm 139:23, 24

I know the Lord has designed a purpose for my life and will use the gifts, talents, personality and strengths He gave me to accomplish that purpose.

But I also know that He refines His children ~ often times through fire ~ so He can remove our rough edges, our selfishness, our pride and reshape us into what He needs us to be. It is never painless or easy. Even Jesus suffered in the garden while the Lord prepared what was to come ~ the death of His Son. The Son who willingly walked to the cross because of His obedience to the Father and His love for us.

"See, I have refined you, though not as silver; I have tested you in the furnace of affliction." Isaiah 48:10

"I know, O Lord, that Your laws are righteous, and in faithfulness You have afflicted me." Psalm 119:75

The Lord may not be ready to put us in the fire yet but I am thankful that when He does it will be for the specific purpose of making us more like Him and drawing us closer to Himself. What a mighty God we serve!

books, books and more books!

We are a family of bibliophiles! Each member of our family wants to own every book he/she reads and enjoys. If we had a mansion it would certainly surrender an entire wing to books, books, books!

Last night I had the privilege of talking with two new-to-home education moms and as I shared what we do (a literature-based education), and was encouraged by what they do, I thought it would be fun to highlight certain books that every library should own. (in my humble opinion)

Of course, it would take me the rest of my life to talk about every great book out there so please know this is by no means an exhaustive list!

Enjoy, and please share some of your favorites with me as well! All genres welcome!

Our first selection:

Written from Noah's perspective as he spends countless hours interacting and studying God's creation up close and personal while floating on the ark.

Absolutely stunning illustrations. You will enjoy them as much as your children.

quote to think on

"Since my heart was touched at seventeen ... I never have awakened from sleep, in sickness or in health, by day or night, without my first waking thought being how best I might serve my Lord." ~ Elizabeth Fry

Elizabeth was a wealthy Quaker woman in the late 1700's who served, ministered to and loved women in prison and taught the governemnt a better way to care for prisoners, thereby revolutionizing the system in England.

telling the truth

Have you ever found that it is easier to tell someone what they want to hear rather than telling them the truth?


So they do not have their feelings hurt, so you do not offend them, because they cannot "handle" the truth, you do not want them to be mad at you or simply because you do not want to deal with the repercussions of speaking the truth.


All of these things have merit to some degree. Scripture does ask us to "do everything possible to live at peace with everyone". To speak only with words that edify and "bring grace to those who hear".


And yet, we are called to be truth tellers. Jesus spent 33 years on earth and he spoke truth every single day of his earthly life and the Gospels tell us that "He left us an example to follow". So it makes sense, does it not, that we should emulate this character trait that we saw in the Lord Himself?


It is hard to hear the truth about yourself from someone else. We may know we are ... controlling, judgmental, a gossip, petty, greedy etc ... but to have someone who loves you look you in the eye and TELL you your weaknesses is difficult to say the least. Our innate desire to save ourselves makes us instantly defensive and we lash out in anger or tears because it is painful to look in the mirror and admit that they are right. It requires change. It requires growth. And neither are easy.

"As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another." Proverbs 27:17

If someone asked "Who would like to rub their bare flesh up and down on this 8 foot iron slab until you are as sharp as a brand new cutting knife?" I bet very few would be screaming, "Pick me! Pick me!"


But this is exactly what we are called to do for one another ... to rub off the debris, the imperfections and the filth that has collected from our selfishness and sin. We are part of God's design! We have the privilege of being used to help one another grow and change and become more like Christ simply by speaking the truth into one another's lives. It will not always be comfortable ... doing the right thing rarely is. It will rarely be asked for or welcomed. But it will always bring honor to the Lord because of our obedience.


"He who turns his brother from sin saves his life."


I have lost friends by speaking the truth. I have had people scream at me and not speak to me because I spoke the truth. And I have seen people weep in brokenness when the truth was held up and shown in a mirror - and they were forever changed.


Because ~ when we stand before a holy God, completely exposed, all things having been revealed, there is no place to run or hide ... He sees all, He knows all and He heals all.

And still He says, "Come just as you are. COME."

anger. repentance. humility. forgiveness.

I am a mother of 5 boys.

I am not a perfect mother.

I get irritated, angry, and annoyed. Sometimes it is justified and sometimes it is simply because I am not getting my way.

A few days ago I was not getting my way. Let me describe the scene.

* It was hot.
* I was looking forward to a nice evening out with a dear friend.
* I planned a nice meal for my men before I left.
* My 3rd child woke up my 4th from his nap by going in the room when he knows that is not allowed.
* My 4th child was whining for about two hours off and on due to the above incident.
* I set the table and served dinner.
* #4 would not eat. He was sent to his room to find a happy heart. About 8 times.
* My oldest decided to wipe his corn-on-the-cob buttered hands on my nice, fabric covered dining chairs. Simply because he could. Leaving blackened grease marks as evidence.
* My 2nd child spilled water all over the table.
* My infant was crying because he was hungry, I did not have time to feed him so I gave him to my groom and tried to leave.

Before leaving, however, I had to make sure everyone knew how irritated I was by all of the above activities. After all, they were the cause of my irritation and my perspiration!

I yelled at everyone! I honestly do not even remember exactly WHAT I yelled - I just know I did. I was seeing red and I was mentally out of control and unleashed on all of them. One of those moments when no one defends themselves or even tries to fight back because they are in such shock and horror at this display of blatant sin and selfishness being played out before them.

I barked "good night" and slammed the door as I walked out of the house.

It was a 35 minute drive to meet my friend and for about 27 of those minutes I was talking to them all and justifying my anger and wrath and walking through each of THEIR transgressions that had put me in this place to begin with.

And then, at minute 28, the Lord grabbed my heart and I knew. I knew I had crossed the line. I knew I needed to apologize, repent and be restored to my family. All of them.

So when my sweet friend walked in looking fresh and adorable, I was on the phone apologizing to each of my children and my husband, one by one. Admitting my selfishness and ugliness. Admitting my embarrassment and asking their forgiveness, which was granted willingly and joyously by each one.

It is quite humbling to go before a 7 year old and ask to be forgiven.

And it is life changing to go before the God of heaven and earth and ask the same.

difference of opinion

We spent some time today with some sweet friends.

We have much in common ~ doctrinal beliefs, parenting style etc. And yet, we disagree on some issues.

And imagine this ~ it is okay!!

We were able to sit around a table as adults and respectfully challenge one another on a comment, listen to another viewpoint, say we disagree and guess what? We are still friends!

In a world where tolerance is just an excuse to let everyone do whatever they want to and not have to answer for it, this is so refreshing. We do not have to agree with someone because to disagree means we are intolerant. We are allowed to have an opinion. We are allowed to disagree. And we are allowed to question the beliefs of one another.

As Christians, we have a responsibility to guard our hearts, minds, and souls so we do not become desensitized to the things of the world and therefore begin justifying our own sin.

"Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers;
but his delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night." ~ Psalm 1:1-21

The world hates Christ, since the fall of man until He returns, this will never change. We need to be equipped to know WHO our God is. What He requires of us. Who He has called us to serve. And where He wants us to go.

We cannot have civilized or intelligent discussions with those who oppose our Biblical worldview if we are not fully armored with God's Word. No one cares about our opinion. No one wants to hear there is "only one way." They only want to be told that "it is not okay for me but if it is okay with you that is fine." You cannot support the philosophy of relativism with Scripture. You simply canNOT.

Praise God for His gift of the Holy Spirit ~ the only One who can convict a hardened heart. He is the only One who can show us our depravity and the need for a Savior. He is the only One who can make blind eyes see.

But we can so easily become sucked into the world's philosophies because we are not on guard - we make small compromises along the way until it is easier to make bigger ones. We tolerate things that are in direct opposition to God's Word and then wonder why people are surprised to find out we are Christians because they thought we were "just like them."

We are to be set apart - like the city on a hill that "cannot be hidden". (Matthew 5) We are separate and distinct and it is because of this that others notice us. When you are just another bulb in Lamps Plus no one notices you. But when you are the only bulb shining in the darkness you bring light to everything around you and snuff out that darkness.

It is time for Christians to stand firm and FIGHT for what matters. To fight for the truths of Scripture. The truths of who God is. We cannot compromise. We may be shunned. Called right wing extremists. Laughed at. Mocked. Who cares?

Until we have a crown of thorns on our head and stripes across our back and the weight of the world's sin on our shoulders, we have no business complaining.

We cannot serve two masters ....

"He who is not with Me is against Me; and he who does not gather with Me scatters." Matthew 12:30.

I pray I will always find myself standing in the right spot.

Why we homeschool.

* This was a response I wrote on a friend's website who was discussing public vs private vs homeschool. But since so many people ask us WHY we do what we do, I thought I would share it with you!

We are entering our 5th year of homeschooling at The Eastman Academy and I fall in love with it more each year.

I have 5 boys and the Lord has clearly called us to this task. (and when I say called I mean He had to hit “redial” a few times before I surrendered.)

I believe there are HUGE benefits to homeschooling and the data is out there – the successes, the community involvement, the grades, the test scores – data – cold hard facts, support what homeschooling is doing. (much to the chagrin of many who say it is a joke!)

But it requires SACRIFICE. Hard work. Consistency. Sacrifice. Patience. Self control. Discipline. Sacrifice.

I hear all the time, “I don’t know how you do it! I could never homeschool!” My response? “Neither can I!” It is by the grace of God and through His wisdom and creativity and strength that I am able to be obedient to His call on our family and educate our children at home.

Our schooling takes about 3-4 hours per day and we spend the other 10 hours on TRAINING and correction and discipline.

Though we expect excellence in all things (chores, studies, manners etc) ~ at the end of the day the character of my children matters more than their ability to recite the Gettysburg address. We are not raising our boys to attend Ivy League schools or become CEO’s or Olympic athletes – we are raising them for ETERNITY.

Which means I am responsible to fill each day of their lives with the things of the Lord … to saturate their minds with Scripture, His goodness, how BIG He is, what He desires of His children. It is my job to equip them with the truth so they are able to enter the world as strong, thinking adults with a Biblical worldview so they can change the world for Jesus Christ.

When we stand before the Lord and are called into account for the care of the children He gave to us, we stand alone. We cannot blame ungodly influences, bad teachers, a godless government, or foolish peers. It is all on us.

We are 100% accountable for everything our children see, hear, touch, do and say.

The Eastman’s do not live in a bubble – we serve our church, we serve our community, our children are engaged in a myriad of activities outside of our home … we cannot hide from the world and we will not shun those who think and do differently than we do. But we CAN hold up God’s standard. We CAN raise the bar. And we can show others the light of Jesus Christ through the love and genuine concern and respect we have for those around us – regardless of our differences.

We love homeschooling – we have seen our children thrive under its influence and have learned to gently stand firm through all of the criticisms and rude comments that bombard us. Though one of the best compliments is when people say “I never would have guessed they were homeschooled – they seem so “normal!" (showing that homeschoolers are breaking the nerd stigma that everyone labels us with! And NO I do not wear denim jumpers!) ;o)

We are excited to see what God has in store for our young men as we continue to seek His wisdom and creativity as we educate our sons and pray earnestly that they will grow to be men of character and godliness who choose to serve the Lord each and every day of their lives.

Reflection

I have always been a person who is willing to share my innermost thoughts, struggles and weaknesses because I learned long ago that when a person is honest about the "ugly" side of life, others feel comfortable opening up about their own troubles. They feel safe. They feel understood.

The usual comment I receive is, "You say the things I am thinking and am too afraid to say out loud." I am honored to do so!

But it has occurred to me lately that while being honest and open about the difficulties in life has a definite purpose, I also want to be a woman who openly and consistently talks about the goodness of God, the blessings He pours down on us, and quite simply, the JOY of being His child!

How do others see Christ in us? When we SHOW them Christ! And the only way to do that is to "praise Him continually with our lips" and "declare His splendor all day long". It is purposeful. It takes thought. And it brings delight to the Lord.

And what better way to begin than to praise God with Scripture!

"Shout for joy to the Lord all the earth, worship the Lord with gladness!" Psalm 100

"I delight greatly in the Lord; my soul rejoices in my God." Isaiah 61:10

"You have made known to me the path of life; You will fill me with joy in Your presence, with eternal pleasures at Your right hand." Psalm 16:11

"I will praise You with the harp for Your faithfulness, O My God; I will sing praise to You with the lyre, O Holy One of Israel. My lips will shout for joy when I sing praise to You ~ I, whom You have redeemed. My tongue will tell of Your righteous acts all day long." Psalm 71:22~24

"I will proclaim the name of the Lord. O, praise the greatness of our God! He is the rock, His works are perfect, and all His ways are just." Deuteronomy 32:3,4

You are my God, and I will give You thanks; You are my God, and I will exalt You. Give thanks to the Lord for He is good. his love endures forever." Psalm 118:28,29

"Let me live that I may praise you." Psalm 119:175